Hype

Yesterday, Kim had the day off work. We went shopping at Target while the kids were in school. He had to get some gifts for the childrens' hospital toy drive his department holds every year and I had to get a birthday present for Connor & Sasha's friend.

As I mind-numbingly stared at a toy I thought would maybe be a good gift, I noticed an unusual number of adults doing the same thing I was: Wandering the toy department in a completely clueless haze. We were lost. All of us.

I ended up striking a conversation with some other moms and we all agreed that most of the toys out there are plain ol' junk. Crap that our kids will play with for a week and then forget about. Huge wastes of money.

So, as we shopped, we looked at each item thinking:

1. This is HOW much??

2. There's no way this is going to last longer than Winter Break.

3. Why on earth are they asking for THIS?!

Take these for example:
They are called Squinkies.

I had no idea what they were and neither did Connor & Sasha, but I've a lot of friends that have bought their kids these little things. So, I looked at them for at least 20 minutes, deciding if they were really worth purchasing.

The other moms at Target said their kids, "looooooove them, but I've no idea why!".

I had no idea either. It's like a glorified gumball machine. You put these little toys into tiny plastic balls and put them in a dispenser. Each dispenser comes with tokens, which you use to get your Squinkie. Then you play with it.

I guess.

Ugh.

All I saw were tiny little pieces of junk that would get lost. And I imagine most, if not all, other parents see the same thing. Which is why we were all walking around in a fog. It's all junk.

But, you know what? I bought a set for this little girl's birthday. I've succumbed to the hype. This is so not like me. I have major hype aversion. I avoid things like this.

After I bought the damn Squinkies, I started thinking of all the toys that were hyped when I was a kid. Some of them were fine, like Cabbage Patch Kids.

Some of them were, um, questionable. Like Garbage Pail Kids.

Who could forget Mugged Marcus?

Fryin' Brian? Nothing says "childhood" like an electric chair.

And, who wouldn't want their 8 yr old to have Boozin' Bruce?

I just want to know what's with the blue bunny, pink elephant and green snake. I've been overserved one too many times and have never ever seen a little pink elephant. I'm thinkin' Boozin' Bruce should've been called: Droppin' Acid Al.

We collected and traded these cards. We LOVED them.

What on earth were our parents thinking?! They let us have these things?? What?

They LET us have these things!!

I feel so much better for buying the damn Squinkies now.